Oh deer.

Took a break from writing when I spotted this guy grazing in my yard. There are still a couple acres of undisturbed hillside along the Hudson, across from NYC. Stark contrast between my front view of the river and bustling midtown, not 20 min away, and my quiet yard full of bunnies, birds and strawberry bushes. Kinda love how two very different worlds come together, between the front and back of my house.

No daring is fatal.

When I'm in need of inspiration I often head back to these passages from Henry Miller's Reflections on Writing. They remind me why I sometimes write 20 pages, walk away, come back, burn it to the ground and start over. One's authentic voice is not always present in a first draft. And unlike advertising copywriting where I need to communicate the voice and tone of someone else's brand, my personal writing needs, more than anything, to speak from my gut. It's hard sometimes to kick all the encroaching stimuli out of one's head, focus on our true thoughts. To be authentic one must be willing to stare down the tough stuff. Run towards it, not away. Not wallow. Just, not back away. Creative people of all sorts dissect things. Understanding that obstacles, debate, challenges teach as much or more as happier themes ever could. If you don't attempt to understand all sides of yourself, how can you write from a place of authenticity? You can still be a person who appreciates the light. I do. I'm just not afraid of the dark. Are you?

Happy Birthday to my Grandmother. What a hot ticket.

There are many strong, awesome women in my family. I'm lucky to have them in my life. My Maternal Grandmother is definitely among them. Mom-Mom was ahead of her time. Even proposed to my Grandfather in the 1920's. Don't hear of too many women doing that now, almost a hundred years later. She was both a lady and a riot. I miss her. But one of the greatest things about a person with spirit like Mom-Mom is that even when they're gone, they never really leave you :)

Mom-Mom & Pop-Pop. Philadelphia, 1933.

M-m-p-p

102nd floor. Sunset. Where will you kick off 2010?

Just caught up with a friend I didn't see on Christmas. She was talking about the New Year and the beginning of a brand new decade. She asked me where I was on January 1st, 2000.

I had forgotten. It was a funny New Year's, 10 years ago. I had been in NYC less than a year. I remember Y2K parties. Prince's 1999 on heavy rotation. And on New Year's Day 2000, I found myself drawn to the Empire State Building. I rode the elevator up at sunset and spent some time looking out over the city, reflecting. 

When we were kids we used to have this game: Every time we drove over a bridge we would open a window, count to three and toss our worries into the water, leaving them behind. I guess the majority of mine are at the bottom of Cape Cod Canal, near the Bourne Bridge :)

So on New Year's Day 2000 we made wishes and tossed our worries off the top of the Empire State Building. True, it's not a bridge. But it stood for many things, my first year in New York. 1999 was a great year. And though my worries were relatively small, it was really the symbolism of the thing. Of leaving what's passed in the past, embracing a new year and all that it brings, lessons in tow.

We don't really need a new year or a new decade to make resolutions or changes. We don't need a bridge to throw away our worries. But if those occasions and places inspire us to make wishes, dream big, take chances, I'm all for it.

2009 was a tough year for many. I won't miss it. But I'm thankful for it's lessons. More than anything, 2009 reminded me of my own resilience. Change isn't comfortable. Especially when it surprises. But metamorphosis and growth aren't supposed to be comfortable. They're supposed to kick you in the ass. Shake you up. They ask of us a willingness to be uncomfortable, to tread in unknown waters. And while this isn't pleasant, the irony is: The times we are pushed out of comfort and forced to embrace our vulnerability are also the times when we are strongest and most open to growth. 

And going out on a limb - whether you were forced or boldly, went willingly - is a far safer bet for growth than hanging out in your comfort zone. It's true of creativity, relationships, careers - everything, really: The greatest risk is not taking one. Here's another one I love: "Boldness has genius, power and magic in it." -Goethe. Sometimes change chooses us. But if we embrace it boldly, however it comes about, we never fail to benefit.

Maybe you loved 2009. Maybe it was one of your best years ever. If so, congrats on bucking a worldwide trend :) Whatever the case, I hope you greet 2010 inspired and open to what's next. Me? I'm taking the elevator back up to the top of the ESB tomorrow. Some of my wishes are different than they were 10 years ago, but I still can't think of a more inspiring place to cast them on New Year's Day. 

If you're up there, say hi. I'll be the girl throwing away worries, pocket full of dreams, taking entirely too many pictures :) Happy New Year!

Nytimes-1-1-2000

Empire State Building > New perspectives. It's got a million.

I take a lot of pics of the ESB. Never get tired of how pretty it is, or of the fact that no matter how many times I've looked at it, it never quite looks the same. My favorite photo opps are the ones I just happen upon, walking down the street in Manhattan. Suddenly the crown of the ESB comes into view between two buildings, in a place I never saw it before.

This first shot was taken this evening when I was walking up 7th Ave, between 22nd & 23rd. The second was taken from the banks of the Hudson.

Yes, Virginia: 112 years old, still incredibly moving & relevant.

What began as a letter to the editor of a NY newspaper in 1897 turned into one of the most heartwarming exchanges ever published. Editor Francis Church's reply reminds me of my favorite book "The Little Prince" in that it encourages us to believe and have faith in things greater than what the material world presents us. And isn't that the basis of everything worth anything? We believe in love, though we cannot touch it. Yet it touches us more than anything else. I can't think of a sweeter holiday reminder that "The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see."

Brunch + Matt Damon Shoot @ 23rd & 10th

One of the things I love about New York is that the city is so dense, shoots appear right in front of you. Today was a rare 70F day in November so we were eating brunch outside @ The Half King. They were shooting the new Matt Damon flick (The Adjustment Bureau) about 20 feet away from us. Although I have to admit I was most interested in the Porsche Pursuit vehicle they were filming with. It looks like the Darth Vader of autos. Ãœber cool.